Chapter 2 and our stereotypes are at Aberyswyth now!
THE VIRGIN!
Lois is disappointed that her dorm room looks like a dorm room.
'In her mind, Lois had imagined an airy, freshly decorated room with a beautiful sea-view.' What, the uni didn't provide pictures and details of the accomodation? Aberystwyth's accomodation is halfway up a steep hill that every student will remember walking up in Fresher's Week when they didn't know to get the buses. So, you know, maybe you can just swap rooms with someone who has got a sea view.
The view she does have doesn't sound too bad though.
'From the outside it looked like a splendid and majestic stone building: built in the 19th century, with gorgeous gardens surrounding its vantage point on Penglais Hill!' See, that doesn't sound awful. Better than getting a view of the laundry room and the college bar where people sang along to 'I believe in a thing called Love' by The Darkness three times every night, AAARGH GOD IT WAS HORRIBLE AAAARGH, WHY, WHY, WHYYYYYYY!
Sorry, flashbacks.
Anyway, there's also a goth in the halls. She has a biker boyfriend and swears. Presumably in Welsh, because everyone in this novel is a Welsh speaker.
Then they talk about getting dressed to go out on the town. Lois is going to wear a demure black dress, cos, you know, sweet virgin! Cerys is wearing her red hot pants. And a tight boobs hugging t-shirt. Cos, you know, WHORE! Cerys tells her to wear lots of make-up so the barmen don't think they're underage. It's Fresher's Week, you're in a university town, and it's 1991. No one is going to be asking for anyone's ID. Hywel's going too. No one cares about Hywel. Lois apparently is disappointed to hear that Law students have to study stuff at university, and that she'd only chosen to do law because she'd been watching LA LAW. AHAHAHAHAHAHA. That's the dumbest thing I ever heard.
How's the Whore?
THE WHOOOOORRREEE!
She got some drinks off a rugby guy named Huw (because it's Wales!). She fantasises about a sexy older man, like a guy named Fabrice she knew. I'm waiting for the novel to do some kind of switch here and tell us that she's actually a virgin. Otherwise I'm gonna think that Cerys is actually a hooker, since she reminisces here about a French city boy who she'd met in a 5 star hotel in St. Tropez, who was at least 30 years old! 'That was the kind of man she was looking for but would she find a sophisticated older fox like that in old-fashioned little Aberystwyth.' The French Department?
Girl, why the fuck are you even going to Aberystwyth, if apparently you've had some jetsetting lifestyle of sex and romance with hot Europeans. You had choices, I assume, and it doesn't sound as if money is an obstacle. Why not Cardiff? Why not London? Why not a continental university? Why university at all? Academics are not that well paid, and not that attractive.
'This bloody hill is a killer.' Ah, Penglais Hill. I remember stumbling up it drunkenly once back to my halls. By the time I reached the top I was sober. It was a pretty good night, and I didn't have a hangover.
Did I mention that I, myself, was an 18 year old fresher in Aberystwyth? Oh yeah, this novel is personal!
Some third year guys are having some initiation party and Cerys's £100 Toni and Guy hairdo might get ruined! £100! FOR A HAIRDO? IN 1991? Toni and Guy charge about £150 in Cardiff now for the most expensive styling option.
HYWEL
Hywel gets tormented by Huw and the stereotypical jock boys for being a nerdy Bible Basher.
Chapter 1
Chapter 3
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