Eurovision 2012: pretty much as expected

Last year, everyone thought it was silly that I would use a free online language course to learn Swedish. 'What will you ever do with Swedish?' Traffas ni i Stockholm nasta ar!  :D
Much like 2009, in the end it became a very predictable affair with the winners.

In fact, it was more surprising how the rest of the scoreboard went, with the biggest surprise, to me at least, being Norway's last place. As soon as this was revealed, I just knew he was the tiebreaker for 10th place in the semi final. I'm equally surprised that he was a tiebreaker with Bulgaria (an underrated entry). What went wrong though? Was is it that he was too much like Eric Saade from last year? The song was very much Eurovision, as it is recently, and being typical of current chart fare. So I'm gonna go with him being Eric Saade 2. Sorry, it really was hard not to notice it. (I hope, for the sake of humanity, that it wasn't because of  hateful white-supremacist articles about the notion of Norway being represented by a gay muslim.)

Other big favourites, in Ireland, Denmark, and the UK, also failed in the end to make an impression in the end. The UK doesn't seem terribly surprising, being performed first. Engelbert's failure is indicative though of the UK's wider detachment from the rest of Europe.

RTE, next year, no more Jedward. The reality is, they're just not that good. I mean, they're better, but they're still not great, and those outfits were ridiculous, and that fountain seemed a bit random. I mean, if you're going to get Jedward wet, this was what you should have gone for

I expect that Ireland will go back to ballad's next year. Ireland's just too conservative to do something really cool, and no one cool watches The Late Late Show, unless they have a nerd crush on Ryan Tubridy. *ahem*

To an extent, Jedward's loss was much the same as everyones. Loreen's victory soaked up most of the points, followed by Russia (WHY????), meaning what was left got spread among predictable blocs, so the non-bloc countries, like France (equal opportunities eye candy) and Ireland, just kinda fell to the bottom of the scoreboard.

And in the end, it was Trackshittaz that came last in the loltastic first semi-final, only managing 8 points.  And Belgium rightly came second last. I really hated that song. Slovakia came last in the second semi-final meaning that I don't know anything, and people aren't voting for a rock entry. Sigh.

Semi Final 2

Watching it on the BBC, the worst part of the show would have to again be the commentary. Sara Cox's 90s laddette humour is more pathetic everytime you see it. Their humour seemed to be limited to 'foreign countries are funny!', as exemplified by the comment 'Baku? It sounds like the name of an IKEA table lamp' and Cox's idiotic attempts at trying to say good luck in Icelandic. Scott Mills began a weird and somewhat bigoted twitter speculation on whether contestants were 'gay and european.' (why would their being 'european' be questioned? This is a european contest.  The United Kingdom is in Europe too)as if their sexuality and nationality needed to be very clearly established.

Terrible BBC commentary aside, there's not much to really comment on in last night's semi. Everyone who got through was pretty much who was expected to get through, with the exception possibly of Malta.
Even the post-show draw didn't throw any curveballs, with favourites Sweden and Serbia occupying the 'winners corner' of the last half. The most interesting thing about it is the news that there was a tie for the tenth position in  last nights semi. 

So, with the semi finals being profoundly unshocking, the final may well go the same way. One of the disadvantages of the tightly-placed semis and final is that there's no room for changes, so we've already seen everything. Plus, the internet coverage of rehearsals provides massive spoilers for everything (even costumes aren't secret.)

It's almost a deterrent.

Semi 1: first thoughts

So.... for a second there, it seemed like there might be a twist and Ireland wouldn't make it through. There did seem something amusing about Sad Jedward. But after some pointless padding by Azerbaijan, and a scan around a lot of very broken-looking performers in the green room, Jedward made the 10 was made up of the ten mostly already expected to get through, who were:

Russia
Moldova
Romania
Greece
Cyprus
Ireland
Hungary
Iceland
Albania
Denmark.


I thought Greece would flop out, but they managed to stick it out. The power of flicky hair and tiny skirts. Actually, her and Cyprus were definitely battling for wardrobe malfunctions (Ivi's dress had some very awkward cleavage. I hope them and Romania all draw together in the final.

Montenegro, Latvia, San Marino, Austria: I don't think anyone expected them to qualify. I think Israel should have had Hungary's place, a song that I can never remember no matter how many times I hear it.

Russia though? SERIOUSLY? WHAT IS WRONG WITH ALL OF YOU????? THAT SONG IS TERRIBLE! And Moldova? I am very concerned about everyone's taste.

Everyone seems to hate Albania. Personally, I like it. I'm glad to see the back of Belgium (that opening shot where her dress was see-through seemed soooo wrong for a 17 year old.)

So, I think we can expect the second semi-final to go as predictably as this one. Yawn. If I wasn't a big fan, I'd just skip past it.

Worst part of the show? None of the songs but the BBC commentary. Urgh, my god, not only are they utterly dull but those boring half-audible interval interviews were clearly at the expense of something FAR MORE INTERESTING ON THE STAGE!!!!

Second worst part of the show? Eldar, my god, he has no charisma, and has anyone struggled so much to read a cue card? I know English probably isn't his first language but that was so stiff. Well, when you could make it out over Scott Mills and Sara Cox jabbering on.

Eurovision: 1912

The other day I had a conversation about how many countries are in the Eurovision, and how it'd be a lot less if it were 1912:

Following last years victory by Mr. Eldar and Mrs Nigar, this years contest will be held in the capital of the Russian Empire, St Petersburg. They will be represented by the young singer Mr Donald Montell. 

Making it's debut in Eurovision this year is the Kingdom of Serbia, represented by Zeljko Joksimovic, singing a ballad about peace in Europe in these troubled times.

Great Britain and Ireland will be represented by brothers John and Edward Grimes, from Dublin, who have been warned not to use the event as a platform to voice Ireland's campaign for independence. Many are unsure if they have the popularity to ensure victory.

The Ottoman Empire has withdrawn from the competition this year, owing to trouble in the region, Bulgaria and Romania have opted not to compete.


Greece has just about managed to compete after economic troubles and political tensions in the region.


Sweden will be represented by Swedish-Finnish singer Miss Pernilla Karlsson with her ballad Nar Jag Blundar, while Denmark will be represented by Icelanders Greta and Jonsi, who have been warned not to use the event as a platform to voice Iceland's campaign for independence. 


San Marino's Miss Monetta is singing a song about typewriters. 




Yep, I really need to get out more.

One DAY!!!!!

Get your sparkly pants ready!

And your clap of disdain with side-eye, courtesy of Pink Belarussian Girl (You'll need it, San Marino are tomorrow)

Decorations up!

Azerbaijan flag, sort of.

Right, it's only two days away so I suppose I should finally get around to giving my opinion on who i think should win, lose etc etc. 

Semi Final One is definitely the fun semi, and since it's inevitable, since it isn't seemingly allowed to be possible that Russia won't qualify, at least something silly will make it to the final. Greece, on the other hand, I think are not so certain a 'certain qualifier', and I think may well go home on Wednesday (and the country probably can't afford hotels till sunday anyway). 

Albania may well scrape through to the final, being all dramatic and serious. But realistically, there's a lot of average and ridiculous stuff in this country, that I think only Denmark, Russia and Ireland are currently certainties. I'm unsure about Iceland because being second kinda sucks. San Marino may not be the biggest loser in this semi, it might even do well (think of the money in making it a success) I still think Latvia has that honour for not being silly enough, and mostly just insipid. 

Semi Final Two then? I'm not sure why so many people think the Ukraine is all that great. But then, I have odd taste. Even though it's last, I'm not convinced that Lithuania will qualify. I don't think anyone genuinely will give Georgia enough to qualify, and honestly, all this 'they're a certain qualifier' stuff does need shaking up. Slovakia might well scrape through with the rock vote, which is increasingly present. I remain forever mixed up with Croatia and Macedonia, and i think it will be the same for the rest of Europe. Serbia and the Scandis are guaranteed (snore), and the rest will likely be the usual suspects. 

The big 6: Italy has the odds now to do the best of the big five. Azerbaijan has never made much of an impression on me, nor has Spain. Germany is a bit sappy, but ok in its way. France... can anyone really tell with France. They always seem to be kinda in a world of their own, doing their own French thing. 

Since this is a year like 2009 with a big favourite leading into it, I'm a bit underwhelmed by it, and actually would like some big shocks and surprises. Since the semi finals came along, the finals have been a bit dull, with the same performances again. It would shake things up massively, considering the superstitions, if Sweden were to end up in spot 2 in the final, so I'm crossing my fingers for that. The hot favourite never seems to end up in that spot! 

It's rehearsals time! YAY!!!

So.... this afternoon/morning/night (depending where you are) rehearsals for Eurovision kicked off.



Now, obviously these are just the first rehearsals so you can't really tell much about the end product, but you can tell a few things... so pretty much regard this post as filled with BIG SPOILERS!!!!


Montenegro:
Disappointingly straight-looking, but there's potential for something ridiculous to come.... I hope. That EuroNeuro banner definitely leaves the potential for hijinks. Is never going to qualify, so yeah... let's move on*

Iceland:
These two are so pro. This song is so cool (in every sense, they're from Iceland!)

Latvia:
Still boring

Greece:
I'm thinking this song is going to flop out like Armenia last year. Eleftheria's only move seems to be to shake her hair around a bit. God, does that look stupid.

Albania:
I'm rooting for this one. Come on, people, this is just the first rehearsal, that woman has pipes!

Romania:
Looks more promising than before, a bit fun.

Switzerland:
It seems like this song has been around forever now. This one was first previewed like last September or so. So if it's not made an impression yet, it never will.

Belgium:
Will never like this song. Annoyingly false. Annoyingly bland, and provides a nice toilet break.

Finland
Still under-rated. Still a bit sappy. Green is a good colour for red-heads.

Not long to go...

till Montenegro trolls and the show begins.

Of all the songs to get drawn first! LOL. Montenegro don't have much luck with these things do they?

Samis will ruin your Eurovision entries

Am I the only one who likes this song... until the Sami appears.

Sequins

Oh, I forgot to keep up the random lyrics of the day. Tooji is mad





shameless gif reuse.

Anyway, I bought a sequin dress to watch the eurovision in 20 days time. :) Because it's not eurovision without someone in sequins. Even the gimps are faabulous.

I think instead of betting on the winner this year because it's apparently Sweden we should bet on the person wearing the most sparkly ridiculous outfit?